Wednesday, June 13, 2007

The thorn in my side

Have you ever dealt with something for years and thought you had conquered it just to have it flare up again? Well, I have dealt with anxiety since around the 7th grade. I threw up every morning before school if I ate breakfast, so I stopped eating breakfast. Throughout my teenage and adult years I have been through periods where it is definitely more intense. Now is one of those times. Since yesterday, I've had those old feelings again-feelings I thought were gone. If you have anxiety or panic attacks you know that you can't just put your finger on what is causing it-thinking it away doesn't help. You just do the best you can to get through it and hope it goes away soon. It could be caused in part because of the stress of this move and all the changes we are going through. People with anxiety do not usually deal well with change. JP just found out they granted his request to go to the day shift starting next Monday. So we finish out this week with him working second shift and getting home at midnight. I should be relaxed about this but instead here I am stressing out to the point of anxiety. Why is that? (that is a rhetorical question but if anyone has an answer, I'll take it). I think in these blogs we tend to just blog about things that are going good. Well I want to be real and this is where I am right now. If you could say a little prayer for me today, I sure would appreciate it.


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