Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Some days

This is a processing post...so please excuse it's lack of coherency and please realize this may be exaggerated out of my heightened sense of frustration.

We are having issues.  My son is very bright but some days he acts like he can't remember how to add.  Some days he is pumping out work, doing great, getting done.  And some days, it's 2:15 and he's been working almost all day just on his book work.  Our joint work -not even gotten to yet.  I give him so many chances, yell a little, help him a lot.  It's frustrating and frankly depressing.  He writes everything sloppy, because he's just trying to get done quickly.  Today, he did the wrong set of math problems.  He misses problems he knows how to do, just because he's not paying attention.   I've tried changing math programs to accomodate but that didn't work either.  So I just put him back into Saxon.   I really don't think it's a math problem, because he can do challenging work if I'm there with him.  He did his spelling wrong because he didn't read the instructions...and it goes on and on.

We need drastic change.  I'm frustrated, losing my temper because I know he can do this.  He has been having some sleep issues as well--waking up at like 4 AM or getting up before 6:30 AM.   I know some of these bad days can be attributed to not enough sleep.  He's grumpy, extra hungry, and crying easily.  When he gets into serious trouble, like losing tons of stuff, he can snap to and get to work.  Like right now, he's working and doing great---after 6 hours. 

Tera is done way before him, and I try to get our together subjects done, but some days like today that doesn't happen.  I feel so disorganized when I've been dealing with him like this for several days, I just can't think straight.  I need to start doing things with Michael too, but I feel very overwelmed today.  I'm tired and feel like it's cheating the other two as well.  Yelling and threatening doesn't work.  I give him too many chances, so I think he's taking advantage of my inconsistency.  Starting tomorrow, we go to a new system. 

 JP and I sat down today and figured out a system for his work.  Basically earning points for each subject done neatly (Math is earned on accuracy) and other points for getting done in a reasonable amount of time.  We spelled out all the details and printed it out.   For each point he loses, he receives a punishment in the form of early bedtime, no sweets, no videos- (which all in my opinion probably contribute to this problem anyway).  He must earn a certain amount of points in order to keep upcoming privileges- (picking his own haircut on Friday, picking his Halloween costume, keeping all his Halloween candy).  We tried to pick tangible things that reflected good choice/bad choice.  If you make good choices, you get to make your own choices about some things.  If you make bad choices, you lose those freedoms. 

I hope this will get him back on track.  I hope this will help me become more consistent.  For a while, JP and I are going to discuss whether or not he meets the criteria.  I need some accountability as well.  I hate for him to lose things that are important to him, but this is not helping him in the long run. 

Right now, he's still working, but his attitude is better than it's been all day.  His work is better than it's been all day.  Hopefully, we are already on the right track and this too shall pass. 

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